Written by The Noosance
Print this

Friday, 20 April 2007

image for Prominent Republicans Demand Gonzales Take Alzheimer's Drug
Didn't I just take one of those?

Though tests in March proved he did not have Alzheimer's disease, embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzales faced growing demands from leading Republicans to take the Alzheimer's drug, Aricept®, even as the White House continued to back his memory.

During an intensive grilling session from the Senate Judiciary Committee, Gonzales apologized for his lack of clarity regarding the attorney firings but said that his recollection of the Raquel Welch poster he had on his wall as a prepubescent boy was strong and that he would still be able to function effectively in his current position without medication.

"I have been pleased with the Attorney General's memory in the past, and I have full confidence in his memory's future," said President Bush.

The ranking Republican on the panel, Senator Arlen Specter, said he would not publicly demand Gonzales take the drug but recommended that he ask his doctor if Aricept® is right for him.*

*Some Attorney Generals may experience fainting, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, bruising, cramps, loss of appetite, insomnia or bleeding ulcers.

Make The Noosance's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 plus 2?

5 7 6 11
40 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience on our website, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more