Written by KEN RYNNE
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Friday, 20 April 2007

image for F.A.G. Names Alec Baldwin Father of the Year
Next Year, I'll win!

(Hollyweird) -- The Film Actors Guild (F.A.G.) has named Alec Baldwin Father of the Year. "In view of his fine acting in 30 Rock as well as feature film The Departed. Alec is deserving of this fine award," said F.A.G. Prexy Jock Valenti.

"Alec has played a father in over 30 feature films and television series - he is a role model for America," said Biff Badass, a studio hack.

Ex wife Kim Bassinger with whom Mr Baldwin is in a custody battle for access to daughter Ireland Baldwin could not reached for comment but a spokesperson exhaled through clenched teeth a quiet, "Jezuz."

Daughter Ireland, 10, could not be reached but her message machine had this to say,"You're just a little piggy, that's all you are, a little piggy, snort, snort, snort."

Vice President B A Dick Cheney vowed to win the coveted award next year.

Baldwin pal and frequent costar Matt Damon explained succinctly, "Matt Damon."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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