Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 17 April 2007

image for Hillary to recruit Gere for new campaign assault
A public grope with Richard Gere could be worth another $10million in campaign contributions

Washington DC - (Ass mess): Impressed at Richard Gere's ratings jump following his public 'True Lies' tango-esuqe grope of Shilpa Shetty in New Delhi, Hillary Clinton is putting out feelers to recruit the Hollywood actor to do for her what he did to Shilpa.

"Of course, we don't know if there'll be the same chemistry between Richard and Hillary," said her campaign spokeswoman.

"And we definitely don't want it to look tacky like Al Gore and poor old Tipper back in the 2000 campaign."

But the Clinton strategists are not ruling it out although the net might be cast further to see what else a trawl through Hollywood's eligible males might bring up.

"It depends who's hot. Right now we think Larry Birkhead is pretty warm and has all the makings of a red hot shot when he finally gets custody of the baby.

"And last week Prince William might have made it too. But there's still too much cringe factor about him at the moment while his ex garners the sympathy vote from all the Diana freaks who still haven't got themselves a life."

And if all else fails?

"Well, there's always Mr Borat.

"A smoochy one from him at the Hollywood Bowl could be very tempting if the computations are right.

"But we're deferring a decision on that until Mary Cheney names the father of her new baby. And Mr Borat's potential paternity must first be settled beyond a doubt."

Barack Obama is 39.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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