Written by queen mudder
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Sunday, 1 April 2007

image for "I am the dark horseshit candidate": Thompson declares 2008 presidential bid
On yer bike, Thompson!

Wisconsin - (Frankly Ludicrous Press): Tommy Thompson, former Wisconsin Governor and Bush Administration anthrax specialist, has thrown his hat into the 2008 presidential ring.

He joins other wannabe no-hopers such as Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney (66/1 outsider), Arizona Senator John McCain (40/1 with a run) and New York City mayor Rudy Giuliani (33/1 or 28/1, depending on which jockey).

Thompson told ABC's 'This Weak' show today: "I'm telling you, things are starting to coalesce," before the midday sun began addling his brain with a string of farmhouse-related metaphors:

"I AM the dark horse. I am the dark horse stalking horse candidate. And I am the three-legged dark horse stalking horse stalking the other Party candidates. Truss me, I am reliable.

"Before this, I was a dark horse candidate for governor and I was a dark horse candidate when I ran for the Assembly.

"Then I became the underdog, which was purely a tactical change."

Thompson lags behind his better-known rivals at 500/1 at internet spread-betting index Aintgottaprayer.com.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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