Written by Jalapenoman
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Thursday, 29 March 2007

image for New Star Wars Postage Stamps To Be Released
The Death Star (from Star Wars, not Return of the Jedi) will be honored with a U.S. Postage stamp.

Announcement of a series of Star Wars stamps to commemorate the film's 30th anniversary sent collectors and sci-fi fans running to their local post offices. Most jumped for joy to see the tiny pictures of Luke, Chewey, and Han Solo.

Not all people who exited the post offices, however, were happy. One individual, about 6'6' tall with long, floppy ears was obviously upset. "Where's a JarJar? I don see no Missa Binks," he said. "Meesa like JarJar Binks but there no be no stamp fo JarJar!"

"Me sees the R2D2 anna C3PO anna Yoda anna doze other guys, but meesa no see me hero! Day even gots a death star anna x-wing fighter, but no JarJar!"

When asked why the post office did not issue a postage stamp of the character who appeared in three of the films, U.S. Postmaster General Robert Haynes offered the following comment, "All of our new stamps are peel and stick and we were afraid that if we put in a JarJar stamp, people would still want to spit on it."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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