Vice President Dick Cheney collapsed Sunday morning while taking a shower. "Luckily he carries a panic button," said his doctor. "He was dead several minutes before we got to him."
"We're not exactly sure how many heart attacks Mr. Cheney has had to date," said the doctor. "There have been dozens of small episodes. We can't say how many more his body can handle."
Cheney granted The Spoof a rare bedside interview stating that he saw "the other side" while lying unconscious on his bathroom floor.
"It was dark and hot. So hot. It burnt my feet and I collapsed and was burnt even worse. I can't describe the intense pain. It was terrifying."
When asked if there was anything he would have done differently given the chance, Cheney broke down sobbing.
"I regret so much," he kept repeating.
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