Millions of citizens across the United States are being assailed daily with sinister telephone calls from someone calling herself Cammy Argyle, who invariably begins the conversation by asking to speak to 'the lady of the house.'
Cammy Argyle is actually the computerized voice behind The Dove Foundation, an organisation whose mission, to quote their website, is 'to encourage and promote the creation, production, distribution and consumption of wholesome family entertainment.' The Dove Foundation is a non profit organisation, which conveniently gives them immunity from prosecution in the event of complaints made to the Federal Trade Commission, even from people listed in the FTC's National Do Not Call Registry.
Thousands of automated calls are generated every day by the animatronic crank. What few people realize is that Cammy is operated from behind the scenes by a silent army of telesoftware operators simply clicking on the most appropriate response to whoever is on the other end of the phone line. The software behind the system is called Hoodwink, developed by the Lying for Jesus Corporation of Purgatory, Nebraska.
Their aim is to persuade people to watch only those movies which have been awarded the Dove Foundation 'Family Approved Seal'. The shady cabal of self appointed censors who set up this organization overtly condemn Harry Potter movies for being 'occultist', while covertly selling the same DVD's through their affiliated online store.
Next time you get a call from Cammy you might want to mention how spooky it is that The Dove Foundation appears to be a satanically constructed anagram of Death to Fun on Video and see if they have a response for that.