George Bush called a meeting of congress early Thursday to let them know of his decision to remove all American troops in Iraq, directly after which he yelled:
"April Fools! You should've seen the look on your faces!"
After being notified that it was, in fact not April 1st, but March 1st, the president replied in a sing-song voice "Heh-heh, I'm the president, I can do what I want."
"But you really had to see the look on your faces! Imagine, me pulling troops out of Iraq! Ha! When Dickie's lesbo daughter gets a marriage license, then we'll talk."
According to eye witness reports, Vice President Cheney responded by sticking his hand up the back of the presidents suit jacket, twiddling his fingers around and making him say that "I revoke all of the statements I just said. I love lesbians, almost as much as I love Dick Cheney. Long live the glorious Dick Cheney."