Global Warming Warning Sentinel Al Gore is reported to have overheated at the Oscars!
Out of respect for the new environmentalism in Hollywood, stars like Leonardo DiCapprio who live in mansions that could house an army and are driven in HumVee Limos that use the annual oil production of Mexico in a week decided to make the Oscars green (Not that there hasn't been enough jealousy there every year!).
The applause was taped so it could be recycled and replayed at Bush's last State of the Union speech, if there still is an Union by then! Jack Nicholson's drunken smile will be donated to some sad child by the Make-A-Wish foundation and the energy generated by all of the hot air released throughout the week,during the ceremonies and the after-parties will be captured and used to power every windmill and balloon in the world.
One of the heat monitors that tracked the increase in global warming during the ceremony was placed in the underpants of Inconvenient Truth Gore and the device is said to have burst as the attention-starved loser pissed himself when the documentary won two Oscars.Gossip columnists in Hollywood are reporting that Gore will become a lesbian so he can dump stiff Tipper and go with hot-not globally warmingly speaking-Melissa Etheridge.