Written by Felix Minderbinder
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Topics: George W. Bush, Oil

Thursday, 15 February 2007

image for Bush Defends Iraq Troop Surge Amidst Republican Protest
Nodding Donkey...no...wait...it's George Bush!

WASHINGTON (AFP) -- As senior Republicans and the White House conceded defeat on a House resolution opposing the decision to send additional US cannon fodder to Iraq, President George W. Bush defended his troop surge by saying "It will help the American body bag industry."

The nonbinding resolution included dozens and dozens of Republicans who denounced the hair-brained scheme that puts 21,500 more combat troops in the middle of a civil war in order to grab Iraqi oilfields for Exxon Mobil and Chevron Texaco.

Bush told Congress "Every American soldier who dies in my oil war creates jobs in our thriving body bag industry, not to mention in our funeral services sector. Those jobs are important. My Zionist masters at AIPAC and in Tel Aviv told me to say that."

Those same breakaway Republicans and Democrats are now planning to kill funding for the troop surge, which will stop Bush's nefarious plans in its tracks.

When told that he has completely lost the support of the Republican Party, Bush told a reporter that he was now planning on severing his connection with Republicans entirely by forming the Chimpanzee Party "which will be totally funded by the oil industry, Israel, and by various sympathetic warmongering primates."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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