Written by R. Mejia
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Topics: Pizza, Ugly

Wednesday, 14 February 2007

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"Pizza Face" Rodriguez, "Thunder Thighs" Koontz, and "Ugly-Jo" Martin are each being held by authorities indefinitely under a no-bond status. The girls are awaiting arraignment in a multi-jurisdictional sting which culminated yesterday in the discovery of 15 "popular" girls found bound and gagged in a high school janitor's closet.

"It was freaky" stated the lovely Lori Petty, flicking her silky hair to one side and batting her doe-like eyes, "one minute we were sitting at a lunch table not really eating anything, then suddenly we were shoved into the janitor's closet by some big awkward looking girls yelling 'we hate you, why don't you just go away!'"

After preliminary questioning by investigators, the trio of unpopular girls issued full confessions. "We thought eliminating our competition would free the cute guys up to pay attention to us."

"I guess it was a stupid idea," said Thunder, "they didn't really want talk to us anyway, even after we hid the other girls from them."

Copyright 2007, R. Mejia

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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