President Bush, in an effort to gain Congressional support and support from the American people for his plan of more troops in Iraq, jumped off the Washington Monument today with a hang glider. For some who read the news, a bald eagle trying to carry a deer head crashed into power lines in Juneau, Alaska knocking out power to about 10,000 residents on Sunday.
The president thankfully was not carrying a deer head, but did carry the weight of a controversial war and budget, which eventually caused him to crash into the Vietnam Memorial.
"We saw him jump off and do several circles around the Lincoln Memorial and then head toward the black, granite wall," one eye witness said. "We thought he was going to have trouble with the power lines, but barely missed them."
Eye witnesses to the crash say that it didn't seem to phase the president. If fact, he tried to minimize it by turning it into a joke. But when reporters asking him about the cracked femur bone sticking through his thigh he simply replied that "it was nothing," raised himself, walked a few steps and collapsed.
Taken to Bethesda Hospital in Maryland and treated for broken bones, denial and delusions of grandeur, one psychologist on staff asked the president if he was familiar with the story of Icarus.
The president was reported to have told the good doctor that he wasn't much of a reader and had never heard of the story before.
The psychologist, Dr. Sigmund Soda, asked the president if he would like to hear the story? The president replied, "yes."
Then, Dr. Soda read to the president, bedside, while he listened to it with gleaming intent and later asked Dr. Soda for a cola.
In other news today, Dick Cheney says that he will bungee jump from the Washington Monument if the public will support the president in the war.