Inspired by the clever title of The Every Child Matters Education Foundation's latest publication: "Homeland Insecurities" by Michael Petit, the NO Child Left behind President established a new cabinet level position Secretary of Homeland Insecurities.
New Secretary, Linus Van Pelt, was heard discussing some of his plans for his department: "Since our fair land is last in infant mortality, teen births, health coverage for children, death rate from child abuse and children living in poverty, we have decided to distribute millions of Homeland Insecurities Blankets as our first action step." Blankets will be made by Halliburton and sold to the government at the usual 300% mark up.
The only Presidential historian not yet caught for plagarism, DeWitt Clinton HS History Chairman Obama Baracka commented: "How appropriate that our most insecure President will go down in history with a blanket as his legacy. All that bluster and bullying is just a cover-up for a really scared human being.Once America sees the real Bush and how much like this frightened nation their President is, I think they will embrace him and support a Constitutional amendment for a third term".