Washington, D.C.-- Sen. Barack Obama, the charismatic junior senator from Illinois, announced today that news of his taking the first formal step towards a run for the 2008 Democratic presidential nomination are untrue.
Obama's bid for the Whitehouse has been totally misunderstood by the Democratic majority in D.C., The "bid" Barack talks about is a proposal as a contractor to paint the Whitehouse!
According to Mr. Obama, one morning back in his hometown of Skunk Water, Illinois, while reading the morning paper, read an article put out by a racist editor in the Skunk Water Tribune. It read "...The only way I'll vote for a colored president would be the day they paint the Whitehouse...BLACK!"
"Dem folks up deah on dee hill, fo'getz eye iz a lie-sence painta's contrata.", Obama confesses, "The reesons eye comz ta Washington iz fo ta paint'in"
Upon reading the hometown headline, he decided to "gas up the dodge ", and sped down to Washington to bid for the job, hours after reading the article. Osama doubled parked outside 1600 Pennsylvania, He jumped the fence, raced across the lawn & rang the doorbell. Just at that moment, Senate Democratic Leader, Harry Reid, was leaving after a meeting with President Bush, when he opened the door and found Barack standing at the doorway.
"Wen dee gentamanz openz dee do', eye sez to heem, eye com fo dee bid on dee race fo' de Whitehouse.", Reid sized up Barack smiled and replied, "I think you'll do just fine!, the American people have demanded a new direction." Evah since dat dey, eye benz shakin' hanz wit lotsa white folks. Talkin' ta me bout thing iz don?t undastan, so eye jus nod ma heed an sez, "a-huh soundz great!". Dey smile, an sez ta me, "Fantaztik".
The Democrats are now left with a embarrassing situation. Whether to allow Osama, who has gained tremendous support in all 50 states as a possible Whitehouse front runner to continue to run or instead run down to Home Depot for supplies.