Written by queen mudder
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Thursday, 11 January 2007

image for Secrets of the Altair Voyager: Cheney and his lowlife hooker
RN minnows compared to the Altair Voyager

California - (Ass Mess): The Chevron oil company's 2001 renaming of The Condoleezza Rice, one of their top double-hulled tankers, as The Altair Voyager may be an even greater embarrassment to Vice President Dick Cheney than previously thought according to court documents threatening to blow the lid off BP Oil's disastrous environmental and employee policy in the California Supreme Court.

The Chevron tanker was named after board-member Rice as a tongue-in-cheek gesture by the oil company after private investigators' reports showed she had been hired by BP's CEO Lord Browne and his accomplice Cheney on behalf of the Bush family after the first Iraq war. Her mandate was to spy on, smear the reputation and attempt to blackmail Chevron's largest institutional shareholders into surrendering all their stockholding to the Halliburton Corporation. She failed and was outed by a posse of Chevron lawyers in a video-taped incident that shook the CIA to its very toenails at a moment when they were barely recovering from being infiltrated by the Aldrich Ames scandal.

Ms Rice was established as an amateurish plonker who walked easily straight into a series of sophisticated scams that exposed her mercenary position including all the organised crime cartels that ensured George Bush Junior made a living pre his Texan governorship while staying out of hot water.

When push came to shove in late 2000 and Rice made her bid for control of the Chevron empire, Bush Jr called her to work as his national security advisor.

But Chevron easily showed her up to be the lousy third rate poker player that she really is in an extraordinary general meeting of the managing board that unveiled the results of the private investigations and made her sign the videotaped confession.

That document has remained in the Chevron company's legal strongbox ever since.

Meanwhile the quandry about what to do with the Bahamian registered tanker was soon resolved when the board voted unanimously to rename the vessel after Altair, the very brightest star in the firmament in the constellation of Aquilla, the eagle.

As a footnote it is worthwhile mentioning that a former CIA scientist writing under the pseudonym Michael Wolf once wrote his trilogy, The Catchers of Heaven, after becoming the unwitting victim of one of his very own PsychOps scams which programmed his brain into believing that aliens who had infiltrated Planet Earth and were controling a secret alternative global government also hailed from Altair in the eagle constellation.

All the time he was working at the CIA he was also a paid mercenary for Cheney whose lawyers grew hysterical after a series of disastrous lawsuits in the US and elsewhere named the VP as having a disgusting sexually predatory past which his family paid the Justice Department to conceal.

Michael Wolf gained notoriety with is ufological writings after a state of stalemate was declared in a series of lawsuits against the CIA which culminated in the hapless agency having to bust one of their top operatives, Aldrich Ames, for being a lackey of KGB slimebag Vlad 'The Impaler' Putain, now President of Russia.

Wolf died in 2001 some four months after the Altair Voyager made her maiden trip under her new celestial name.

A number of attempts to secure the copyright to Chevron's legal papers have been made by Hollywood studios angling after a movie deal on the naming of the Altair Voyager. But the company remains adamant that there is some unfinished business on the Dick Cheney front and that first things must come first.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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