Written by President Bush
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Thursday, 28 December 2006

image for Obama and Edwards Vie for America's Youngest President Title
An old geezer going to vote for a Sesame Street Toddler?

John Edwards, John Kerry's old running mate tossed his hat into the '08 presidential race today. Barack Obama, himself a toddler like Edwards (according to Herbert Walker Bush) is expected to soon announce his 2008 presidential aspirations as well. Former president Herbert Walker Bush told Houston KHAN reporters,

"They're kids .. babies these guys running for the highest office in the land. Look at me, look at my son. Do we look like toddlers to you? George is going on 61 now and he can't even rope a mule."

Houston reporters told the ex-president "no" and assured Mr Bush that he and his wife Barb especially were indeed the oldest looking people in the land if not the universe.

Barack Obama (age 45, younger than FARRAH FAWCETT even according to Herbert Walker) is still undecided even though Oprah Winfrey backs the Senator from Illinois with over 0.0000021% of her cash reserves.

John Edwards, (younger than Susanne Summers according to Herbert Walker) many say would make an excellent president. Edwards today not only announced his plan to run in 2008 but also his plan to remove all U.S. troops from Iraq the moment he's inaugurated.

"Whipper Snappers all of them" President Herbert Walker Bush told reporters. When asked why someone younger than say, HIS age (110) could NOT run the country effectively President Herbert Walker Bush had, as David Letterman has every week night TWO words ..

"George Dubya".

History books tell us that America has indeed had very young presidents, President Kennedy being one of them. Herbert Walker pointed out however,

"The boy cheated on Jackie with Marilyn Monroe. The BOY almost got us into a nuclear war with Russia. The BOY got himself shot in a parade in Dallas for crying out loud need I say more?"

Reporters told the former president "no". John Edwards, cognizant of the fact that president Herbert Walker thinks of him as a child told reporters this morning,

"I may be a child but at least I'm not an old geezer"

leaving Herbert Walker Bush to ponder in private the words of the possible future president of the United States of America.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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