Written by StubbornGorilla
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Topics: Donald Trump

Wednesday, 23 August 2017

image for Those who can, Lead. Those who can't, just keep campaigning...
"Don't you guys ever get sick of my "smug face"?"

Mistaking the Presidency for a popularity contest that he hasn't even won yet, president Trump continues to work the crowds in an apparent attempt to dodge doing any real work.

"I've done more than any President up to this point in history," Trump has been saying since his first week on the job. We can only assume that this is some sort of spoken Mad Lib that we are supposed to fill a word or phrase ourselves. The best we have come up with so far is:

"I've done more golfing than any President up to this point in history."

"I've done more whining, by far than any President up to this point in history."

"I've done more damage to the United Staes and the office of the Presidency than any President up to this point in history."

We're pretty sure this isn't what he had in mind, but unless he is completely self-deluded and a total narcissist he couldn't possibly believe... Oh Wait. Anyway, he must have gotten bored signing his name to stuff all the time and pretending that is the same thing as accomplishing stuff so he's out doing what he does best.

In-between complimenting himself with overblown adjectives of adoration, and blaming every stupid thing he has said on some sort of Jedi Mind Trick he's convinced the media is able to perform, Trump spends most of his rally time acting like he's already done with work for his first term and is already concentrating on his reelection bid in 2020.

Now, Trump does have a pretty strong list of unaccomplishments, such as: NOT building a wall, NOT instituting a Muslim travel ban, and NOT repealing Obamacare. And that's just his greatest hits. With all the important looking paper signings he's done you'd think at least one of them would have actually done something. Fortunately, the Judicial Branch of the United States government has stepped up, and performed some serviceable damage control. Maybe that's why Trump is confused and thinks he still needs to campaign. Although, since looking important is the only thing president Trump really cares about, maybe he hasn't even noticed how ineffectual he has been.

Maybe we are over thinking this. Maybe he isn't confused, or dodging work. He's proven to be terrible at pretty much everything else the job entails, so he is sticking to what he knows. The Donald is always in his element surround by automatons that soak up his nonsense like a sponge, so it should come as no surprise that is how he spends his time. Actually acting as Commander in Chief is such an overwhelming and thankless job, and we all know Trump doesn't do anything (or nothing) without taking full credit for it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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