Written by thomas o'hanlon
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Topics: The Spoof, business

Sunday, 19 February 2017

image for Spoof reporter to hire firm to garner '5 thumbs up'
veteran Spoof Journalist George Porgeman

Veteran Spoof Journalist, George Porgeman is reaching out to the advertising agency Madison Lexington to help influence his adoring public to register 5 thumbs up for his dispatches

"I try to get as many family members as I can" said Mr. Porgeman "some comply like my 9-year-old daughter Katie but most just say things like 'oh great, George, you wrote another one? Yeah when I get time I'll read it' but I think they must be busy because I only see the one thumbs up from sweet little Katie"

Madison Lexington account rep Ralph Bennet is planning a marketing blitz throughout the world using posters, e-mail, snail mail, sky writers, blimps, prime time television commercials and more.

"I believe if we make the public curious about Mr. Porgeman's reports and then urge them to give a 5 thumbs up rating then we shall see a significant rise in his results"

I asked Mr. Bennet what he will propose to influence readers to actually commence the exhausting action of clicking on the 5 thumbs he replied "We will, in all our campaigns include the phrase ''if you click on the 5 thumb rating you may win a prize' of course there will be no prize just the hope that one 'may' win a prize of course legally that also implies that one 'may not' win a prize. My client is spending enough on the campaign has no budget for actually doling out prizes"

Mr. Porgeman is driven by a lifelong dream. "when I was a young boy" he said "banging out nonsense on my Selectric typewriter I set a goal that has kept me in this business for over fifty years, reaching for that unreachable brass ring that all Spoof writers set out to do, toppling Gail Farrelly once and for all!"

Make thomas o'hanlon's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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