Written by GProwler
Rating:
Share/Bookmark
Print this

Wednesday, 18 January 2017

image for 'Lemmings To The Sea Award' for 2017 Bestowed to America in Only Third Week of Year

More On, a California Think Tank has given the United States of America its dubious distinction in only the third week of the year. It's the first time a country, rather than a business or individual, has been given the award which honors 'decisions showing a reckless lack of judgment and foresight equal to blindly jumping off a cliff.'

It's not only the earliest, by some eleven months, for the presentation of the award but also the first unanimous decision by the board.

"It was obvious that nothing could top America's bizarre turn of events so why wait until the end of the year." Said Owen Richards, head of statistical analysis at More On.

There were many reasons listed for the award but nearly all centered on the election of Donald Trump and the Republican Party, a collection of backward thinkers with little governing experience, now given near complete control of the nations laws and direction.

Some of the examples cited for presenting the award were the "immediate gutting of health care with no viable alternatives, attempting to dilute the Ethics Committee as the first order of business, nominating cabinet members ill suited or hostile to agencies they were chosen to lead, threatening the freedom of the press and conflict of interest running amuck within the administration. And this was even before the somewhat elected president had been inaugurated."

Past 'winners' have been the New Coke, 20th Century Fox allowing George Lucas to retain rights to 'Star War' merchandise, NASA using the metric system while Lockheed used the English system to build a failed spacecraft, allowing Russian contractors to build the American embassy in Moscow resulting in massive security breeches and the Trojan Horse.

Make GProwler's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!


More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 1 multiplied by 4?

9 4 22 1
60 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more