Written by That Guy
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Topics: Donald Trump, UCLA

Tuesday, 20 December 2016

President-elect Donald Trump announced on twitter last night that he was going to release a new book titled "How to Become a Billionaire President, The Donald Trump Story." He tweeted all about how excited he was about the new book, and how it would be "an inspiration to the masses" and would "inspire people to be great." his full tweet reads as follows:

"Over my very long and great life, many people have asked me: 'Donald, you're great, how'd you do it?' 'Donald, how did you beat her?' So I decided to write a book as a manual on how to become a billionaire and a president. I hope that all of the people that have had a chance to be near me all of my life can get an inside look at how to become great. It will inspire people to be great, and be an inspiration to the masses. I recommend that the college students read this book so that one day they'll get over this whole 'riot' thing and grow up to be great billionaires."

Mr. Trump, as always, held a press conference about the book to give the press a chance to ask some questions.

Mr. Trump was as asked about many things regarding the book and how he was going to get the word out for the book. His response is as follows:

"That's a great question and I really like it. I am going to hold an autograph signing at UCLA to get the word out to everyone that my new, amazing book is ready for purchase. I will sign not only books, but anything that is signable, so that everyone has a little memento of when they met the greatest man on earth."

He then was asked how he was going to make sure that the students did not riot. He responded as follows:

"I would like to think that the students would not like to riot about the greatest president ever visiting their college, I think it'll be great. But we always have a backup plan. If they decide they want to riot, we will give them the boot. We will have a literal boot attached to a garbage truck to drive them away from the signing and then we'll take away their citizenship."

The president-elect concluded his conference as follows:

"We are going to have a bunch of people in this country reading this book, it's going to be huge, it's going to be great. We are going to have a new generation of billionaires, and it's going to make our country greater than it was already going to be," said Mr. Trump.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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