Written by That Guy
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Topics: Barack Obama

Tuesday, 13 December 2016

image for President Obama Moves to De-Militarize the Armed Forces; Trump Responds "Bigly"
Obama

Today at the White House, President Barack Obama said that his last move as president will be to "de-militarize" the Army.

"The rate of killings of innocent militants in Iraq is out of control. Although our friends on the right might call them radicals, they are people too. There is only one way to deal with this in an appropriate way, that way is to de-militarize all of our armed forces."

He then continued on to say that he was not going to disarm the military, but he was going to give them lots of different "less-than-lethal options" to use in the field.

"As standing President of the United States I have seen a lot of killing of innocent muslims in their own country. Enough is enough. we need to start arresting and prosecuting these people as opposed to killing them. To do this we need to take away the arms of the armed forces, and replace them with tranquilizers and bean bag guns. These weapons are called less-than lethal options."

Later that day the President-Elect responded with a few comments out of the front of Trump Tower:

"Mr. Obama doesn't know what he's talking about, he's probably been blinded by stupidity. I think that his mistake is going to cost us bigly. Even if Mr. Obama succeeds in his plan to de-militarize the military, which by the way is even dumber than taking all of their guns away, I can just re-militarize the military, and make it bigger than it was before, trust me, it'll be huge."

Mr. Trump concluded with a few remarks regarding the president's "lack of patriotism."

"The problem here is a lack of patriotism. I think that our president is a little tired of our country. That is fine, Mr. President, go back to Kenya where you belong," said Mr. Trump.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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