Written by Mike Peril
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Saturday, 12 November 2016

image for USA to Split into Two Countries
New Citizen of United Middle States is Thrilled

Washington, DC - With anti-Trump protests occurring along the two U.S. coasts, the US House and Senate are proposing an emergency bill to split the United States into two countries.

Donald J. Trump will serve as President of the United Middle States of America and Hillary Rodham Clinton will serve as President of the United Coastal States of America.

Clinton, last seen hiking in the woods, has agreed to accept the nomination, stating in a tweet, " I am woman hear me roar! After all I did get the most votes."

Trump also seemed relieved, tweeting at 3 a.m., "Hopefully half the work, yes let's do it!"

Both countries will operate under the same US Constution but interpretations are expected to be different at times. The four progressive justices will stay with Coastal US and the four conservative judges will preside over the Middle US. The capital of the Middle US will be Kansas City.

The countries intend to collaborate and share expenses and resources on certain matters for efficiency only, and all citizens, except Muslims, blacks, Mexicans and women, may cross borders freely.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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