Written by Paul Blake
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Topics: California

Tuesday, 18 October 2016

image for California Offers "You're Fired!" Voting Method
This Woman Takes A Moment To Prepare For Her "You're Fired!" Vote.

Sacramento, Calif - The California State Assembly approved a controversial new voting system late Monday night, now known as the "You're Fired!" voting method.

"It's so easy and convenient," explained Democratic Chairperson Amy Thumbsdown. "You can just come on by any voting office and, instead of taking all of the time to go into the voting booth and fill out the little form, you can now simply scream, "You're fired!" at a life-size cutout of Donald Trump! Each photograph will count as a legally valid vote for Hillary, and be emailed to Trump's campaign headquarters. So simple and easy, right?"

Others, like the early voters we saw casting their ballots by this method for President, felt that this was a great way to relieve a lot of the stress brought on by all the political commercials and simply having to see Trump's face that many times per day. "I just really wanted to scream in his pig-face!" yelped Jasper Winniker, who felt much better after her blood-curdling scream had finished echoing through the Primary School. "A weight has really been lifted, I feel much better! It's like free therapy... and you get to vote!" exclaimed Ms. Winniker with a heel click. "Thanks California!"

And that's exactly what The State Assembly members who passed the Bill hoped would happen. That after a long and dirty campaign, California voters would finally have a bit of well-earned closure if they could take a nice picture of themselves home, screaming "You're Fired!" in Donald Trumps face.

"You still get the little 'I Voted!' sticker too!" assures Ms. Thumbsdown. "And we will have drive-thru options available in most inner-city neighborhoods soon! Oh, and we'll also accept sky-writing messages as well!"

Trump's only tweet on the matter: Just More Liberal Media Nazis At Work Folks. I'll never step down. Never Ever Ever!


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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