Written by mikewadestr
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Thursday, 5 May 2016

image for Man Forced to Pay Gambling Debt he owes from Parallel Universe
You mean a straight beats a flush? Dayum!

Clearwater, Florida guy, Sammy Dweeberson, spent a pretty uneventful life, up until now. His daily routine consisted of a shower and a nose shave, a breakfast of asparagus cookies, work at a candle manufacturing factory, a stop at a Popeye's on the way home and then an evening of reading Candle Maker's Life and then to bed.

Unfortunately his alternative self in the parallel universe of Yaw Yklim on the plant of Htrea was a heavy gambler and owed thousands of dollars to people you wouldn't want borrowing your Lego set. To make matters worse, his other self, had been recently killed by a duck suffering from fowl beak disease, leaving the debt unpaid.

Immediately after his gambler self was terminated a bookie from Htrea came to collect the outstanding debt by going through a hyperspace warp which landed him inside a local Starbucks and soon demanded Dweeberson pay up the fine of 000,120$ srollod or else they would break all of the pieces of his Lego sets. Mr. Dweeberson did seek help from the law but was rebuffed when a lawyer mentioned that paradox gaming laws between the two universes do apply in his case.

"This is just unreal", lamented Dweeberson. "Here I am footing the bill for an alternative me who had way more fun than I ever did. This guy not only was a gambler but, also, a big time womanizer and partier. The fuck has all the fun and stiffs me like a crowbar up a crab's ass".

"What really sucks is the bookie told me my other self bet all his money on can opening competitions which are really big in their world. I mean, I eat all my food out of cans, hell I open cans all the time. I bet I'm one of the best can openers on the planet. Just think, if I would have been in that universe I could have been somebody. I could have been a contender".

As of press time Mr. Dweeberson was selling all of his Lego sets on htrae's commerce site of Yabe to raise money to cover the debt.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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