Written by Michael Balton
Print this

Sunday, 24 April 2016

image for Candidates start a new Earth Day competition: being buried alive
Tombs with a view..l

New York -- The presidential candidates came face to face with the essence of Earth Day, The five dug their own graves, were covered with soil, and settled down in a contest to see who could last the longest in an embrace wih Mother Earth.

"No need to worry about safety,"said Dave Fabest, director of stunts and dirty tricks for the federal election board. "These graves are as shallow as the candidates."

The idea was to avoid more debates which amount to recitations of the candidates well worn stump speeches.

"You can call this a dirt debate," the official noted. "The contestants are six inches under and they have to breathe through the soil.They don't have the air to make long winded promises".

Before entering their graves, the competitors discussed their chances to win...

Said Bernie Sanders: "As long as there is one percent oxygen in the dirt, I will prevail. I've made a good livvtng going after the one percent."

Asked Clinton: "How many millions are you paying?""

Noted Ted Cruz: "We used to do this in Transylvania all the time.".

Trump said: " And you're good at lying."

Said John Kasich: "How come I'm always last?"

Make Michael Balton's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 3?

4 16 8 15
49 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more