Written by joseph k winter
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Tuesday, 5 January 2016

image for Collapse of Trump's campaign compared to the sound of the longest flatulence on record
Enormous amplifiers carried the sound far and wide

As is well known in science hot air rises, but it also accumulates interiorly as a nation responds to candidates in the US 2016 presidential election.

The sensation of this election season has been the way two mavericks have taken center stage in US politics and may face each other next November.

The most notorious of these, Mr. Donald Trump, has dug deep into his experience all the way back to childhood to take on and defeat his opponents.

In a recent interview Mr. Trump maintained that insult and sneering is a time-honored tool back to the time of Nero whether in the schoolyard or the debate stage.

Nothing beats a little demonizing, according to Mr. Trump, along with reliance on the short memories of his audience. Contradicting himself, he states, "is no problem."

Working the wellsprings of irrationality and emotion on the other hand is "crucial" to "getting the right impression."

As Mr. Trump continued with his backyard bully boy approach some pundits questioned how long before the hole he was digging would collapse under him leaving him down deep and no longer visible.

The problem was exacerbated in Iowa as polls showed him second and falling, and he replied with turned backside indicating he might loose air.

Additionally, while looking back over his right shoulder, he stated, "Here's what I think of Iowa voters. They're disgusting!"

Almost immediately a new sound in the US arose from every corner in the form of amplified lengthy flatulence.

Apparently, previously unknown citizens groups had mounted enormous loudspeakers throughout the land in a campaign to amplify the sound of "Trump's thinking about America and the world."

Massive signs accompanied this display, with verbiage such as "Trump is disgusting!"

A Princeton English professor, who requested anonymity, has suggested this loudspeaker demonstration is symbolic of "the long building interior tensions of the American populace" in response to "a candidate ill-disposed to occupy an honorable office."

Trump supporters, on the other hand, were quick to point out this sound was "absolutely appropriate" to "the current establishment" and "the state of today's America."

Moreover, it was only Mr. Trump who had the audacity and bravery to "say it like it is" with this unique use of intestinal language.

Mr. Sanders responded: "I would only add this statement is eloquent in response to our current economic system."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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