Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Topics: Politics, GOP

Thursday, 5 November 2015

"Shocked but not surprised," stated a well known political analyst when a spokesman for the Republican Party announced the cancellation of future debates and substituted a nationally televised Circle Jerk to be shown on Fox News. A Fox News spokesman confirmed the new format and stated, "Pretty much our same format as always, just a larger circle!"

Apparently not all of the current candidates will participate for reasons not stated. The New York Times in a feature article this morning says most of the front runners in the race have agreed to participate with the possible exception of Donald Trump who told the newspaper he would have to check with his doctor. "I was told not to lift anything heavy," said Trump. "I'm sure we can work it out," said The Donald with a grin.

Other reactions included Ran Paul who stated he would be there and bring his tweezers and a magnifying glass.

Jeb Bush has confirmed his participation and word has leaked out from his campaign that his new rallying cry would be---"JAB! JAB! JAB!"

Carly Fiorini was has confirmed she would participate on a limited basis but wouuld bring her Selfie Stick. "Can't wait," stated Fiorini.

According to the Times, Ben Carson was the most enthusiastic of the candidates. "Of "Of course I'll be there" stated Carson with a sly grin. "As we all know," he hesitated, "I have a built in advantage!"

According to the newspaper, one of its reporters approached Hillary Clinton as she left a rally in Iowa.

"What do you think of this new development from the GOP," he asked.
"Are you kidding," stated Clinton with a big laugh. "Wish I could be on that stage! At least there would be someone there with a set of balls!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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