Written by Buck E Filbert
Print this
Topics: George W. Bush, Iraq

Friday, 1 December 2006

image for Bush Administration takes unorthadox action
The clouds are to be seeded with bacon bits

"We're going to play hardball with these pesky insurgents", announced President Bush today at a congressional hearing on the war in Iraq, "how can you run a decent war if the opponents don't fully cooperate?"

Sources report that Bush has found it hard to compete with the high levels of hostile antagonism the US has endured in Iraq. Following a lengthy meeting with a group of advisers, he feels a solution to the "insufferable nuisance" has finally been reached.

The reported that each NATO soldier will be equipped with a barbecue grill and five kilos of various pork products. The clouds are to be seeded with bacon bits and planes will be equipped to bomb the area with pigs.

Bush explained, "We know they don't dig no swine. We feel our plans are a solid course of action."

A spokesman for the Halliburton Meat Products and Oscar Myer Pork Division insisted "Pork is the most versatile of meats and should be enjoyed by all. Pork is the other white meat." The Pork council is said to be pleased that the US is not pulling out of Iraq, but is instead putting them in.

The ASPCA has responded to the plans with dismay. They commented, "You simply can't bomb people with live pigs. It's cruel, wrong, and a totally unusual punishment. Especially for the pigs."

Religious groups have unanimously condemned Bush's actions against the faiths and beliefs of the Iraqi people as simply barbaric.

From the desk of
Buck E. Filbert
Dec. 1, 2006

Make Buck E Filbert's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 5?

5 24 22 15
53 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more