The biggest confidence trick of all time was uncovered today as an ex Power Plant Manager revealed that electricity did not exist and never had done. Huge companies selling the invisible "magic" power substance have apparently been pulling a fast one for decades. The world's "electricity" has actually all the time secretly been gas, supplied through hollow wires all along. Batteries are really gas cylinders and all appliances are cleverly disguised gas powered units according to a conspiracy theory revealed today.
Secret funds have accumulated in offshore accounts channeled through to so called "electricity" producing companies. The money, thus laundered is used to buy diamonds which are transported by aliens to Area 51 and then on to Mars to fund an invasion force intended to enslave the population of Earth.
A spokesperson for a major power transmission company told our reporter, "I'm surprised that we've gotten away with it for so long, when you think about it, nobody can see the stuff, smell it or anything. The only other con trick of this magnitude was when someone convinced the population to buy horse crap because it "made plants grow".