Written by Keith Shirey
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Saturday, 4 October 2014

image for Real Reason For Ebola In Dallas Discovered
Proper Swing Cause Of Dallas' Fears

DALLAS -- Health officials' handling of the first Ebola patient diagnosed in the United States continued to raise questions Friday, after the hospital that is treating the patient and that mistakenly sent him home when he first came to its emergency room acknowledged that both the nurses and the doctors in that initial visit had access to the fact that he had arrived from Liberia.

On Thursday the hospital blamed its electronic health records system for its disastrous decision. But on Friday it retracted its statement and said the problem was that "doctors don't talk to nurses in the emergency room."

When asked about the hospital's admission, Dr. Rupert Bones, the attending physician said, "Well, I guess that's true. But the nurses don't wear white coats like doctors and, besides, they haven't attained our educational level and thus don't have our high prestige and status. i don't really want to talk to them and they're hostile to me for some reason."

When queried why he didn't ask why where he was from, considering the illness the man from Liberia presented, and his speaking with an African accent, Dr. Bones responded.

"I was thinking about my golf swing. That's not unusual for Doctors, I think everyone understands that."
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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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