Public health officials have acknowledged the possibility that anyone could contract Ebola just by surfing the web; widening the possibility that anyone even just reading this article has probably contracted the killer disease.
According to "Chubby Chris", who works in the cafeteria of Memorial Hospital in Savannah Georgia, who claims he overheard 'someone' say 'something' to 'someone else' the virus could be spreading through the internet.
"It's constantly evolving, people are going to get e-mails and if they open up the attachments they are going to catch Ebola. Also websites have been infected, forget your standard anti-virus software, it won't work, people are going to die and Obama is hiding the truth," the tubby former meth addict told friends as he finished his seventh beer at The Long Branch bar in Savannah.
"How many people will contract Ebola, I don't know that. I am just repeating what I heard."
Several of Chris' uneducated, misinformed and rather stupid friends have either set fire to their laptops or placed their computers in closets until Chris gives the all clear.