The offer of $40Bn to turn Scotland into a MacDisney Theme Park with Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip as "fairy tale" Queen and King will not be accepted, a Scottish Nationalist claimed while addressing a meeting of the "What to do with Scotland" party in Glasgow. "We are probably going to revert to using the forests and moors for their original purpose if anyone can remember what it was" she told the meeting.
"Currently The Royals pay people to rear special G.M. Blackbirds which are stupid, fat, slow-flying birds. The bird allegedly are painted with day - glow colours and have 10 pound weights and blindfolds fitted to them. Then footmen scare the birds into hidden pie molds. Prince Charles then makes them into Blackbird pies using four and twenty per pie. Because of recent incidents at Royal Banquets at which the pies were opened and the birds began to sing, The Royals will have to shoot at FoodMart frozen chickens which are fit to set before a King.