Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 30 August 2014

image for Roman Abramovich gets the ice bucket challenge from Fifth Avenue co-op board
Now he's got rising damp around his manhood

New York - Russian mobster Roman Abramovich has been waterboarded in Manhattan in the latest ice bucket challenge twist.

This afternoon a five-strong, $250m Manhattan co-op board poured icy cold water on the Russian's condo plans before drenching him in the nuts - uh, foyer of the Berwind Building.

The gangster was left clutching suspected chilblains on his icicle-covered crotch.

"It's all part of this latest craze for cha-ri-dee," an attorney for the co-op board commented as a vid of the soaking went viral.

His clients at the Upper East Side mansion are said to be holding out for tens of millions dollars extra from the Russian gangster whose buy out plans for the iconic Central Park property have been slammed as 'naive'.

"Always reckoned he looks a bit wet behind the ears, as they say," the lawyer added.

"Now he's got rising damp around his manhood."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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