Written by miserablematilda
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Topics: Joan Rivers

Friday, 29 August 2014

Joan Rivers is reportedly critical after she stopped breathing during vocal chord surgery.

An unnamed source revealed that the surgery was intended to 'remove a build up of vitriol'. He went on to say that 'various isms had calcified', effectively forming a lump that was described as 'a nodule of hate'.

Miss River's family have asked for prayers for Joan who has has been described both as a national treasure and as a slightly tranny looking fascist. Many people have answered the call to prayer, but it is thought that very few of those have faced East.

Controversial views aside, Joan's influence is far reaching. As news of her condition broke, share prices for Botox dropped considerably. Or atat least they would have done, if they had still had their full range of motion.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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