Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 9 August 2014

image for Fuel stolen from pipeline under the West Wing
Crude heist from right under Obama's nose

Washington DC - The Secret Service has discovered $20m of fuel is missing from a pipeline running under the West Wing, part of the Biden-Keystone** strategic reserve.

A probe into its upstream reservoir feed this weekend found clear signs of tampering including a great big chisel, bolt cutters and a 100ft siphon.

Investigators said up to 10,000 gallons a day may have gone AWOL since December last year - from right under the President's nose.

And in an astonishing parallel universe twist British cops today reported that thieves too have siphoned off £8m of aviation fuel from a pipeline running under Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg's official country seat.

Robotic moles had drilled into the the beautiful herbaceous borders at Chevening House before sucking dry the pipeline of 5-star unleaded derv.

"Absolutely nothing to do with us," a spokesperson for ExxonMobil said

** Cops

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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