Written by Chantellephone
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Topics: employment, Jobs

Sunday, 27 July 2014

Mark Dooley, newest employee at Jackson and Blythe Insurance, has filed a sexual harassment complaint with head office.

"I'm a pretty shy guy at first," Dooley explained. "During my second week on the job, my supervisor Karen Dickinson started chatting me up."

When asked to tell her about himself, Dooley rattled off where he grew up and mentioned his alma mater. But Dickinson had other topics in mind.

"She looked bored while I was speaking, interrupted me and said, 'so what are your sex fantasies?' I must have looked shocked because she then said, 'never mind. If your family's home was on fire and you could only save one parent, who would it be?'"

Dooley tells us up until that point, Karen seemed nice enough and her queries completely caught him off guard.

"Whatever happened to just shooting the shit with people? I tried to walk away, but she followed me, asking non-stop questions. 'Did I like to be choked? How about spanked? What's my favorite color/food/movie? Did I believe in astrology? Did I think Cher would make a comeback?' Then the questions stopped and she started saying random words: 'pink, toast, egg, Jesus, toilet, four.' I wondered if she was having some sort of seizure."

When Jackson and Blythe Insurance were asked for an official statement regarding the incident, no one could be reached for comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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