Written by E. Williams
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Thursday, 10 July 2014

image for Pres. Obama Goes Strong to Hoop on Border Security, Issues New # Campaign
President Obama working hard on border security.

Texas - In a move to signal to the nation how serious he is on solving the border crisis in Texas, President Obama launched a new Twitter campaign aimed at forcing the hordes of illegal immigrants trying to come into our country to instantly lose hope and do the unthinkable: self-deport.

"Today, I am launching #PleaseRespectOurBorders, a Twitter campaign to show these young people coming up through Mexico and trying to start a new life here that this will not happen." The President stated.

The strongly worded tweet would be enough to scare the Chinese or even the Russian military, let alone thousands of destitute immigrants who can't even read English and have no idea what the tweet says.

One refugee, El Capitan Emerica, told us in Spanish, "The whole world knows when Obama speaks it means he is serious. When he starts a line with 'Let me be clear', I nearly always wet my pants. I don't know what this hashtag thing is but it sounds berry, berry serious."

Citizens around the world have come to realize how powerful the president's # campaigns are. So far, Michelle Obama has launched a #BringBackOurGirls campaign against an African terrorist group which has resulted in, oh wait, it has resulted in zero girls being freed. Never mind.

But we're sure this latest # campaign will be more impactful. First, it's on Twitter. All refugees have Twitter accounts. Secondly, the president said 'Please.' That has to garner some respect. Right?

Since the president launched the #PleaseRespectOurBorders campaign last night, it has been retweeted once and favorited three times. Clearly, momentum is building.

Once it hits critical mass, we are hopeful the thousands at the border will realize this concert is sold out and they will turn around and go home.

America is are truly lucky to have such a strong and tech-savvy leader.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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