Never, Never Land - Snow White, legendary storybook character, was indicted today on first-degree murder charges. The victim named in the case was another popular story character, Humpty Dumpty. Detectives opened the cold case, after advances in forensic science enabled them to see the old evidence in a new and different light.
"Snow White was always the prime suspect in the case. We all liked her for the crime, but we were never able to gather enough evidence to charge her. We now have DNA evidence that supports our case, and puts her at the scene of the crime."
Lawyers for Snow White say that she plans to plead "not guilty."
"That egghead (Dumpty) got drunk and fell off the wall without any help from our client. She was nowhere near him at the time of the incident."
Detectives say that DNA evidence collected at the scene of the crime proves Snow White was involved.
Sources close to "Snow" say she no longer resides with the Seven Dwarfs. Apparently, Snow White got sick and tired of cleaning up after the "nasty little slobs" as she calls them. Rumor has it that she may be living with the "Three Little Pigs", but who knows?