Written by El Capitaz
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Tuesday, 13 May 2014

image for Donald Sterling to Join Militia with Cliven Bundy
An impartial black man confirming by telephone that both Bundy and Sterling are racist

In a surprise move that observers say is unlikely to gain him any support, disgraced Los Angeles Clipper owner Donald Sterling announced today that he is traveling to Nevada to join the militia with embattled rancher Cliven Bundy.

Sterling, who made a fortune for himself as an ambulance-chasing personal injury attorney and slumlord before buying the NBA franchise, is said to be offering his expertise in the areas of law and real estate, two key areas of dispute in the Bundy saga.

"Mr. Sterling will not provide armed support, but rather intends to help Bundy establish a working farm for any black people on welfare who would like to raise cotton as an alternative to living on the public dole" said a spokesperson.

Skeptic say Sterling is simply fabricating more evidence of dementia, in anticipation of an insanity plea for his defense, when the case goes to court.

"There's no place for dementia in our league" intoned a somber Irving 'Magic' Johnson.

A spokesperson for the militia protecting Cliven Bundy from federal law enforcement officers, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, was also skeptical. "They mean well. They just want to help black people; they want to give them some land to farm. But what they don't seem to realize is that black people--like all other people--generally prefer to get money for nothing as opposed to working for it. So that's the flaw in the plan."

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