Written by D P Whitehead
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Friday, 18 April 2014

image for Burgled Tybee Man Calls Police and Orders Pizza - Pizza Arrives First
Want To Go Harass Some Negroes?

Police in Georgia have apologized to a Tybee Island man after they took over 2 hours to respond to a 911 call after the victim returned home from work to find his home had been burgled.

Simon Brown claims that while he was waiting for police to arrive he ordered a Pizza for delivery which, by the time officers responded to his call, he had not only eaten but regurgitated several times.

"It's darn ridiculous" Brown said "I got home from work at 6 and called the police as soon as I had seen that my front door had been forced open. After 30 minutes of waiting I felt peckish and ordered a pizza, it arrived 20 minutes later. It is ridiculous that the police took so long to respond."

Tybee Police Chief Henry Corruptible issued a full apology, stating: "Our officers did not respond appropriately to Mr Brown's 9911 call as they were too busy harassing visitors to our small town and eating doughnuts. I simply have no excuse for their actions. However, as a gesture of good will, the next time Mr Brown needs us and calls 911 he will not only receive a prompt response but a complimentary delivery of 6 garlic breadsticks and a one litre bottle of his favorite soft drink."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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