Forget crystal Meth and Marijuana, as they are both easily made or legal here and several other countries, the Mexican Drug Lords are now making most of their money by selling expensive body parts like kidneys and livers.
"I can't believe all the money we wasted beheading all those people and allowing their body parts to be buried", stated one person this reporter will never reveal (besides the drug dealers all look alike and are fat, unlike us).
How is it done?
"Through the proper channels in the United States. Ever notice that the big money people get their livers first?"
A second drug lord told us that they picked the noonday hour to slip up and grab a victim and then bring him back and it's at least 24 hours before anyone realizes his siesta will be for a very long time. Then he laughed at his own joke and so did his men and me, after a knife was up against my ribs.
"I bet you have two fine kidneys and a good liver, eh?"
Then we all had another big laugh, until the tears fell from my eyes.