Written by Catchthisdrift
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Monday, 24 March 2014

image for Despite Missing Jet Story, Most Americans Still Can't Find Malaysia On A Map

Bumblephuck, U.S. (FoxNews) - Despite the deluge of media coverage on the disappearance of Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370, most Americans still can't find Malaysia on a map of the world.

Studies conducted over many years before the jet went missing had already shown that the vast majority of Americans could not find pretty much anywhere on a world map, including the United States. Education experts had expressed hope that if shown enough maps on television shows, each with Malaysia and the jet's path highlighted in bright colors, that just maybe some of the people watching might absorb a little bit of world geography.

Said one expert "we were hoping at the very least they'd learn there were two hemispheres - possibly even be able to find somewhere big, like Australia. But we saw no improvement, and in fact in some ways we saw a backslide in knowledge. Many of the people we interviewed said they "was pretty sure I saw that jet fly over."

There was one area of the knowledge of world geography that did show some improvement. When shown a map of the world, many of those in the most recent study could point to the "white parts at the bottom" of the map and correctly state "them's the cold parts." They were mistaken however that Antarctica is where the reality television show "Ice Road Truckers" is filmed.

One bright spot from this most recent study was that the majority of the study's population knew that the leg bone is connected to the knee bone. Also, that when a particular leg, such as left, was put back in, you had to shake it all about.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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