Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 7 March 2014

image for Putin's daughter Yekaterina files for US political asylum
Putin's daughters have their father's eyes

New York - Outed as the secret eminence grise behind notorious Russian protest band Pussy Riot President Vladimir Putin's younger daughter has fled her Kiev, Ukraine safe house on a one way ticket to the USA.

Yekaterina Yemiddletona arrived at JFK Airport this morning clutching millions of dollars in Russian Gazprom shares and a mysterious USB memory stick said to contain stuff about 'Daddy's private investment portfolio'.

All pretty useful to the naturalization process.

Commenting on her asylum request lawyers from Tribeca's Three Black Katz Law Firm issued a statement saying their client's elder sister Masha 'The Basher' Putin-Rasputin would be joining her sibling in a joint citizenship application.

"The sisters will be living mostly in Denver, Colorado," Jack Boa-Constricta, attorney-at-law said this morning, "where they gave just bought a 10,000-acre macrobiotic organic pot farm."

Another property close to New York's Madison Avenue, registered in the women's names, is currently rented out to a members of the Bloodyvostock Skanks rock group.

Russian Prime Monster Dim Eatery Med Vet Def is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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