Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 1 March 2014

image for Roman Abramovich is exiled Hollywood director Roman Polanski's son
Tricky Dicky was Polanski's brother

Aspen, Colorado - Workmen refurbishing Russian mobster Roman Abramovich's Dun-Frackin ski lodge in Wildcat Ridge, Aspen, have recovered hundreds of intact historical documents in a dumpster containing a ton of his shredded personal papers.

Among them were dozens of baby photographs showing Polish-born movie director Roman Polanski and a young Roman Abramovich.

A smiling President Richard Nixon, his arm draped protectively around father and son, completes the heartfelt tableau.

This morning a number of images from the seized picture cache suddenly vanished into cyberspace after being posted overnight on Californian celebwatch site LAFagHagSlagMagRag.con.

Reporters' calls to the Abramovich residence have yielded nothing amid a frantic search to locate the builders in charge of the refurb.

However a ski chalet janitor at a neighboring Rocky Mountains mansion was able to fill in NewsCorpse stringers what locals had always suspected:

"You still wondering why Abramovich's private piggy bank is called Milhous Investments?" Herbie Budden chuckled.

"That'sTricky Dicky's middle name."

Rumors in the famous ski resort previously linked Roman Polanski with exotic French actor Gerard Depardieu whose sudden acquisition of Russian citizenship remains an anomaly.

Maria Sharapova is 22.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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