Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 19 February 2014

image for US issues alert over choux pastry bomber
Shoe Bomber Richard Reid's breakfast croissant

New York - Department of Homeland Insecurity bosses are warning of a new lethal trend in international terror after discovering a consignment of Semtex explosives disguised as choux pastry in an airplane shipment headed for a DC patisserie.

It's thought to be the first time that terrorists have resorts to using the highly combustible cake mix in their recipe for international destruction since getting the idea from a scene in the Jack Lemmon/Tony Curtis/Marilyn Monroe movie Some Like It Hot featuring AK 47-wielding mobsters jumping out of a large birthday cake.

Choux pastry is a firm favorite among Washington's sweet-toothed political elite with millions of dollars spent every day on chocolate eclairs, choux buns and other yummy treats.

The original French recipe consists of adding sifted flour to melting butter, beating rapidly over a low heat before whisking in eggs and sugar until the batter looks golden and glossy.

"Yeah, the terrists almost had us fooled," a Homeland spokesman commented.

"Fortunately our counter-terror agents know the difference between highly explosive Semtex paste and the delicious pastry, on account of compulsory cookery lessons in their first year of training."

Convicted Shoe Bomber Richard Reid is more of a yellowcake cupcake fan.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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