Washington D.C. The Obama administration went into full damage limitation mode yesterday after delicate negotiations with Iran over nuclear weapons and cultural spheres of influence came crashing to a halt when the White House is believed to have accidentally sent a copy of Superman II (starring Terence Stamp) to the Ayatollah instead of a painstakingly worded message of peace from the President to Iran's spiritual leader.
Iranian officials say the Ayatollah was deeply alarmed, baffled and offended by the bizarre gesture and moved immediately to call off negotiations with the Americans who in his opinion "prove by this that they are Satanic. They are on intoxicants,..to attempt a stunt like this in the middle of such negotiations is evidence of a grossly unbalanced mind."
Spokesman for President "The current situation is a result of an administrative error and one we are truly sorry for. We are still trying to work out what happened.We would ask the Iranians to not view this as representative of our negotiating position."
Superman II is considered to be the most memorable installment of the franchise. Released in 1980 it depicts earth at the mercy of an airborne troika of superhuman villains dressed in black led by General Zod (Stamp). In the finale Superman manages to save earth by using a crystal chamber made from kryptonite to deprive them of their powers, imprisoning all three in a seemingly 2-dimensional triangular shaped prison and casting them into deep space.
Privately Iranian officials conceded that the stance towards America taken by Superman's nemesis in the film drew some grudging admiration from the Ayatollah's entourage but negotiators are crestfallen. "Terrence Stamp may become admired in Iran in generations to come but the reality is we spend months trying to build up a meaningful relationship with the U.S. ... now this."