WASHINGTON, D.C. - FAIR, the Fathers for American Immigration Reform, announced today that they are lobbying Congress to return the Statue of Liberty to France.
The Statue of Liberty Enlightening the World was a gift from France and since its dedication in 1886, has stood like a beacon of freedom to the world.
According to Bjorg Bjorgenson, a spokesman for FAIR, "We object to the inscription at the bottom of the statue. It has been an open invitation to the world for 128 years: come one, come all, eat us out of house and home, use up all our resources, take our jobs and take opportunities away from our children."
"Listen to the words of the inscription," continued Bjorgenson, "'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!'. In our opinion, America has left "the front door light on" way too long!"
"We believe that France set America up," explained Bjorgenson, "What seemed like a gift of friendship was actually their way of dumping the responsibility for the world's immigrants on us. We propose to send that statue back to France. Let France deal with all the tired, poor, huddled masses and all the wretched refuse, for a change. We think the U.S.A. has done it's share of taking care of the world's people. Over 76 million people immigrated to the U.S. during the years from 1820 to 2010 and that number doesn't even include illegal immigrants!"
When asked when his family immigrated to the U.S., Bjorgsenson replied, "My family ancestry is Viking, whose presence in this country has been established as 992 A.D. Obviously, I belong here!"