Written by Bureau
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Wednesday, 12 February 2014

image for Alcohol Makes You Lose Brain Cells? Not According To Idiot/Savant!
"Oh, about 60-65!"

Everybody's alarmed at the recent report that "Alcohol Destroys Brain Cells".

Of course, I tell them we only use ten percent of our brain anyway according to those same people, right? So I read about how many brain cells we have to lose and it's not so bad at all. They just wanted to scare us as usual.

I gave my whole math problem to an idiot/savant whose brother is a friend of mine.

"Hey Jude! Come in hear and listen to Dave's numbers."

So Jude took in all my number of brain cells and the fact that if I lose the amount when I started drinking and asked him, how long will I have a good mind.

"You don't have one of those now", stated my friend.

"You let Jude here figure this out and stay out of it. Who's the Idiot/Savant here?"

So Jude tells me I can drink till I'm 60-65 years old and still be smart enough to quit.

So I've decided to go ahead and drink as I was doing and at about 70-75 years old, they can send me to a nursing home or lock me up to where I can't hurt anybody.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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