Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 9 February 2014

image for A High-Ranking Taliban General Spotted In Yuma, Arizona
Taliban General Gazni Zarfeeza in disguise and talking to Vice-President Joe Biden.

YUMA, Arizona - A private investigator working for the United States government has just informed the press that he has just seen one of the Taliban's highest ranking generals.

The private investigator who did not want his real name revealed, for obvious reasons, stated that he saw Taliban General Gazni Zarfeeza sitting in a booth at a local Burger Bandit Diner.

The PI told Durango Tucker with National Focus Magazine that the diner was crowded with children and adults so he did not want to get into a gunfight with the general, who he happens to know is armed with a mini-version of an AK-47.

The PI said he waited until General Zarfeeza had finished eating his burger and fries before he made a move.

As he stood up to follow the general out into the parking lot, a bus load of elementary school kids suddenly got between him and the Taliban general.

Before the PI could get past the kids, General Zarfeeza had gotten into his 2008 Ford Focus and driven off.

SIDENOTE: The Taliban general sent a letter to one of Yuma's local newspapers with the message: Dear Mr. Private Investigator Man - You are very lucky the school kids got between us because I was carrying my mini-AK-47 and 18 hand grenades.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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