New Jersey legislative investigators had a rather unpleasant surprise this morning, no toilet paper in their restrooms. In fact there was not a roll to be found within 10 blocks of the capital said security guard Buford Hillis "I don't know what happened to it, but it's gone." "I saw some of the Governor's enemies having to wipe with copy paper,it was disgusting".
Capital Insiders say that janitoral staff supervisor, Hector Garcia, told them he received a text message from one of the Governors staff stating "Time for some dump problems at the capital" and he responded accordingly.
In what might be a related incident the body of Hector Garcia was found floating down the Hudson River later in the day. Police are investigating.